Some Web Thing

I told my mom an anecdote from my oh-so-exciting week, and she found it amusing. She said, "That should be some web thing!" That was all I needed. If a 50-some-years-young woman thinks that this anecdote needs to be shared with the masses, what more confirmation could I possibly seek?

The other day when I was on my way home from something that was definitely not getting "chicken" nuggets at Wendy's (because I'm still mad at Wendy's for reasons to be discussed in the future), I saw something odd occurring in front of this income tax place. This happens to be the income tax place where they make some sad individual stand out in the elements wearing a bad Statue of Liberty costume and dance around like they are either suffering from a grand mal seizure or have ants (Claudes*, if you will) crawling all over them. They always remind me of the fits of hysterical dancing people used to have in the Middle Ages. (Otherwise known as MPI- mass psychological illness. You're welcome.)

What I saw immediately intrigued me. I saw not one, but two statue mascots standing in front of the crappy cement hut that served as their place of employment (I think the look it was going for was "recently firebombed"). One was a portly fellow with an astonishingly bushy brown beard, and the other was a scrawny youth. The bearded man was upset. He was gesticulating wildly; his green Statue of Liberty costume billowing around him as he waved his arms about, like a chubby green Jesus. The youth just stood there, looking agitated. I wanted to stop my car and watch this most interesting argument, and possibly befriend this bearded chap, but I had to hurry home. Not because my "food" was getting cold.


The horrible realization I came to is that one of these two men would have to resume dancing after this disagreement was over. Imagine having to embarrass yourself and fake joy by dancing after a terrible fight! That is pure torture. 

I can only imagine what they were fighting about. I like to think it was a love triangle gone wrong or perhaps a disagreement about plans for a jewel heist.


*See Attack of the Ants post. Footnotes are so fancy!